Many surfactant compounds and soaps with various properties are known in the art. Of particular interest are non-ionic and ionic surfactant compounds that perform well in hard water containing elevated levels of alkali-earth metal salts. However, such surfactants are typically manufactured entirely, or in major part, from various expensive and often highly hazardous petrochemicals via complex chemical methods. Therefore, well-performing surfactants that utilize abundant, renewable, and inexpensive raw materials and simpler chemical synthesis methods are highly desired.